Kim’s Fairytale Wedding: A Kardashian Event, Part I

Everything about the Kardashian/Humphries wedding was outrageous and over the top, even in the months leading up to the big day. The two part special started last night three months out from the wedding, which doesn’t leave a lot of time for planning, oh and your typical plastic surgery. Below you’ll find a rundown of the craziest, most bizarre, drama-filled moments.

The Family Meeting
Ok first, how ridiculous is it that the family needs to have a meeting to determine what day Kim and Kris are allowed to get married? Last time I checked, family will make themselves available on the day Kim and Kris choose. Anyway, this is where we see the first of MANY Kris vs. Khloe blowouts. Now let me just say things may have been left out for editing purposes, but from the viewers’ perspective, we see Kris rudely demand that Khloe get him some champagne. For all we know, she could have offered a glass to everyone and not him since she hates him so much. Kris and Khloe bicker back and forth, annoying everyone around them (and those watching). I personally think they are both super immature and need to get over it.

Kardashians 1, Kris 0

Kris’s Dogs
Kris has two of the cutest dogs ever and loves them to death. While Kim, as we’ve all seen, is a major germ-a-phobe and doesn’t necessarily hate dogs, but doesn’t think they belong in the house. This puts Kris and Kim in an interesting predicament. He wants his pups to share the bed, spoiled Kim doesn’t think any person, let alone any animal, should touch her silk comfortable. Give me a break – a house has to be livable, especially if she thinks she’s having kids in a year. So the next day Kim goes out and buys doggie beds and crates, expecting the dogs to sleep in the crates at night. The girl must be nuts! I think a little compromising needs to happen here – Kris’s dogs shouldn’t sleep on the bed, but they absolutely should not be forced into those crates. Come on, Kim!

We’ll call this one a draw.

Wedding Registry
So I know Kris Jenner has to be over-involved in every aspect of her children’s lives, but I’m pretty sure her opinion in China patterns means nothing. I’ve heard this over and over again from guys: the gift registry is the one thing they actually enjoy about the wedding planning. Mama Kris, at least give him this one thing; Kris does have to use the gift every day after all. Kris tries to give Kim his opinion on dishes and silverware, but Mama Kris and Kim are having none of it. Things even get a little awkward when Kris mentions the H on the Hermes plates stands for Humphries, Kim’s new last name… doesn’t sit so well with Mama Kris. This is definitely not the end of the this discussion.

Kardashians 2, Kris 0

Mama Kris’s Plastic Surgery
Leave it to Kris Jenner to make Kim’s wedding all about her. About a month before Kim and Kris’ wedding, Mama Kris decides it’s a good time to have the work done on her face that she had been contemplating. I was a little grossed out when they showed the procedure happening. And for a woman who cares SO much about what other people think of her, Mama Kris actually allowed cameras to film during the recovery. I could have done without this scene! Thought this show was about Kim’s wedding?

The Engagement Party
Kourtney and Khloe hosted an engagement party for Kim and Kris at Khloe and Lamar’s house. It seemed nice and all, but where were their friends? I’m sure there were plenty of people who said they didn’t want to be on camera, but it looked like 10 people showed up. And of course, what would a Kardashian event be without drama. While Kourtney and Khloe are trying to give a speech, Khloe takes jabs at Kris, while he has to stand there and smile pretty. Later Kris goes upstairs to find Khloe to thank her and over hears her talking shit about him. This confrontation was fun. Khloe thinks Kris is using Kim for fame (didn’t Khloe and the whole Kardashian clan do that?) and Kris fights back by asking Khloe if her marriage is for real since she married a Laker in nine days. I think I’m Kris on this one. Khloe just needs to back off.

Kardashians 2, Kris 1

Interrogation Room
While the siblings are hanging out at Khloe’s house, a fun afternoon turns into an argument between Khloe and Kris. I get the feeling these two REALLY don’t like each other. Khloe thinks it’s a good idea to interrogate Kris about his sexual history. I know these girls are open with one another and say whatever comes to mind, but this is not the conversation Khloe should be having with her future brother-in-law. Kris’s past is between him and Kim and you can see how uncomfortable he gets. And besides that, Kris didn’t sign up to have his whole life shared with the world; it’s none of our business.

Later we even see Scott defending Kris to Kourtney. It’s good to see Scott being the nice guy. As someone who has struggled for years to fit in with this family, he knows firsthand how hard this is for Kris. Scott even tells Kourtney to back off – I like it!

Kardashians 2, Kris 2

Prenuptial Agreement
I get it – these fake celebs have so much money that they have to protect themselves should it not last. I think this is a terrible way to go into a marriage, but a lot is at stake. And as Khloe so nicely points on, if Kim and Kris should divorce, the whole brand is on the line. Khloe even uses her marriage with Lamar and their prenup as an example (I for one am shocked that Khloe and Lamar are still holding strong). I think it’s a bit much and way overdramatic, but I guess with these Hollywood weddings, you never know what’s going to happen down the line. I really hope they show this conversation between Kim and Kris in part II… awkward.

Kardashians 3, Kris 2

Wedding Details
Food – Kim can’t make it to the wedding planners to discuss the menu so she sends her mom in her place. Kris shows up too because he will not give in and let Mama Kris run the show. But poor Kris gets shot down over and over. Who can argue this time – hamburgers at a classy wedding, really?

Location – Probably one of the most important parts of the wedding is the location. It can really make or break the entire event. In another shocker to poor Kris, Kim and Mama Kris book the location without even consulting Kris first. At this point, I think I might kill them both if I were Kris and by the look on his face, he wanted to. Kris is clearly PISSED. I think at this point Kim is starting to see how upset Kris is (maybe) and tells him if he doesn’t like it, then she’ll tear up the check. Luckily, he loves the place, but this could have ended very badly.

Transportation – This may be one of the rudest, inconsiderate things I’ve ever seen someone do: Mama Kris gets cars to drive her family to the wedding – Bruce and Kris in one car, Kourtney, Scott and Mason in one car, and Khloe, Lamar and Rob in one car. She doesn’t even think about Kris’s family! Does she expect them to walk to the ceremony? This woman is unbelievable. It’s one thing to not let Kris pick out dishes, but to completely forget about this family? So not ok.

Kardashians 6, Kris 2

Rob’s a Fatty
Completely unrelated to the wedding, it turns out Rob has gained a few pounds since we’ve seen him last. I honestly think he has an eating problem or is seriously depressed. All the boy does is eat and at all hours of the night. Instead of giving Rob the help and support he needs, Khloe and Lamar decide to play a really mean prank on Rob – they buy an alarm magnet. When the pantry is opened, an alarm will go off. Poor Rob sneaks down to the pantry in the middle of the night and unknowingly opens the door. Khloe and Lamar come running down the stairs to catch him red handed, and think it’s hilarious. This leads Rob to move in with Kourtney and Scott. Now it’s sad to see Rob struggling here, but there really is no point in showing this other than to keep the other family members relevant I guess.

Totally unrelated, but I was surprised to see that Kendall and Kylie were missing from most of the action. I don’t even remember them when Kim was trying on dresses… odd.

Tuxedo Fitting
Kim may be the most controlling person I’ve ever seen – sometimes she even makes her mom look good. She is so out of her mind that she shows up at the tuxedo fitting. This is supposed to be a guy thing – at least let Kris have that with his boys. But no, she’s there, directing the show. Not much happens here, but I think he should have told Kim to leave. Instead you just see him ignoring her. Way to deal with your problems, buddy!

Kardashians 7, Kris 2

Kim Confronts Khloe
We all knew this was coming. Eventually Kris comes clean about his fight with Khloe at the engagement party. I’m not really sure why it came up, but I’m glad he said something. Khloe was 100 percent in the wrong here and Kim needed to stand up to her. The thing is, the entire show Khloe was so guilty and was waiting for Kim to yell at her, but the girl will never admit she was wrong. Part I ends with Kim walking out and telling Khloe she’s not welcome at the wedding. Now we all know she’s a bridesmaid and this will blow over, but wow.

Kardashians 7, Kris 3

Well Kris, I guess you’ll learn one of these days. This is just the baggage of marrying a Kardashian. You don’t have to be Bruce or Scott, but you will have to concede some things.

Can’t wait to see what part II brings tonight!

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One thought on “Kim’s Fairytale Wedding: A Kardashian Event, Part I

  1. Pingback: Kim’s Fairytale Wedding: A Kardashian Event, Part II |

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